| 08 August 2009
When we look back on the year of 2009 and baseball, it’ll likely be the “Summer of Steroids.”
Manny Ramirez failed a test. Alex Rodriguez came clean. Word leaked that David Ortiz and Sammy Sosa had enough testosterone flowing through them to make Superman walk the other way in a bar fight.
But taking steroids is a cognizant act, a knowing decision to manipulate your DNA and allow your body to reach peak physical performance. Sure we chastise and chide these players, but who among us doesn’t strive to be the best at whatever we do. It’s the human being in us.
Josh Hamilton is a human being too.
We first knew him as the baby-faced No. 1 overall pick of the 1999 Major League Baseball Draft. The guy that the Tampa Bay Devil Rays thought so highly of, they passed on Josh Beckett to select.
Then we got to know him as Josh Hamilton tortured soul, a guy who had too much handed to him too soon. He fell into the depths of addiction, and out of baseball, winding up on his grandmother’s porch emaciated, and hooked on crack cocaine. He became a cautionary tale of what happens when promise and potential don’t go exactly as planned.
We thought the final chapter of the story was “Josh Hamilton: Reclamation Project,” after he was named to the 2008 All-Star game. There he stole the show from Rodriguez, Ramirez and Derek Jeter, putting on a performance for the ages in the Home Run Derby. We forgave him for his sins, and cheered for him louder than anyone even though Justin Morneau won the derby that night.
That was the lasting image most of us had. That is, until this Saturday.
On that day, photos surfaced of Hamilton drinking alcohol- lots of it- at a Tempe area bar, and playing a little too nice with some of the female wait staff there (If you haven't seen the photos yet, click here)
If it was any other player, we’d simply label as a typical ball-player, a freewheeling skirt chaser. He’d be dishonest and disingenuous, but no different from anybody else.
But it wasn’t any other ball-player, it was Josh Hamilton. A man whose demons run so deep, he makes Pac-Man Jones look like one of the Brady Bunch by comparison. This was Josh Hamilton, who travels with a personal aide on road trips to remove temptation when he’s away from home. A guy who chooses not to eat postgame meals with teammates, to avoid proximity to alcohol.
With the photos hitting the internet Saturday morning, emotions began to fly. Deadspin, the website who released them, mocked Hamilton’s relationship with Jesus Christ in their headline, and rightly so. Readers of the site questioned everything from Hamilton’s virtue to the timing and newsworthiness of the photo release.
But here’s the truth, the pictures should’ve been released.
Josh Hamilton is a man, a real man with real flaws. Addiction isn’t something a 28 day program or psychotherapy can fix. It’s a dark cloud constantly hanging overhead, no matter how bright the star is below.
When I first saw the pictures, my only emotion was empathy. I’ve never met Hamilton, but he seems genuine in his investment to fight his every day struggles and move on from the past. He strives to be the best person he can be every day, but as we all know perfection is an unattainable goal for anyone.
And while I don’t condone Hamilton’s actions with the females in the photos, I can honestly say that I understand as well. Not the body shots and sexual poses, but how every human is effected differently by substance abuse. From friendly to surly, disengaging to gregarious, and happy to sad to happy again, before the blink of an eye.
Sure Josh Hamilton can hit a baseball better than virtually anyone on the planet, but it doesn’t make him a better person than you or me, or the guy who pumping gas down the street.
While I can honestly say I’ve never done illegal drugs in my life, that doesn’t mean I don’t have faults of my own. Real, genuine faults and flaws, each of which have impacted those around me in a myriad of ways.
Which is why I can’t help but forgive Josh Hamilton. Because when I saw those photos with his face and body, I saw a little bit of myself in them as well.
