| 22 February 2010
For those of you wondering why I haven't yet written about Tiger Woods' speech on Friday, I apologize. I was in sex rehab all weekend, and didn't have internet access. I'm kidding of course.
But in all seriousness, the reason I haven't commented yet is because I didn't want to rush to judgments right after the speech.
You know how we are as a society, everyone needs to have an opinion, and everyone needs to have one immediately. Half the time it doesn't matter what the subject is, or what you're saying, just as long as you're saying something, and loudly. Stephen A. Smith seems to have made a nice little career doing just that.
Anyway, when it came to Tiger Woods I didn't want to be that guy. I wanted to take in the speech, swallow it, digest it, think about, listen to others opinions, and then step away for a few days and come back refreshed. I wanted to see if I felt the same way on Monday morning that I did Friday afternoon.
So now that I've done that, taken a few days, did some swallowing, digesting and regurgitating, what do I think of Tiger's speech on Friday? Quite simply, it was a smart, reasonable, well-articulated speech. And at the same time, it taught us absolutely nothing we didn't already know.
For starters, I thought Tiger did several things right. He addressed all the bullet point issues he should have. He admitted to infidelity and cheating and took sole responsibility for it. He admitted to having a problem and seeking therapy to fix it. He absolved his wife from being anything other than an innocent bystander in the whole circus he turned their marriage into. He promised to continue working at his realationship with her, while steadfastly protecting their privacy in the matter (Which I believe he has absolutely every right to do). He stood up for his kids. He denied rumors of domestic violence and performance enhancing drug use, reports that'd been leaked by several media outlets. Basically, he handled this whole situation the way any well-paid legal and PR team would have advised him to. He even threw in a few awkward pauses and extra sighs for effect.
But this speech was also three months in the making. He had time to gauge public opinion, formulate his thoughts, take notes, and deliver the speech that everyone wanted to hear. Sure it was a little choppy at moments, and robotic at others, but from the early returns, it seems like most people bought what he was selling.
Of course, by not answering any questions from the media, he opened up several different cans of worms. He says he's apologetic, ok we get it. But is he sorry for being a bad husband and father, or just for getting exposed as one? Is he really a sex addict, or just a typical guy that likes collecting women the way Jay Leno collects cars? Addiction is a sensitive subject, so I'll leave that one up to Tiger and his doctors.
But finally the most important question that remains unanswered is this: Is Tiger Woods truly committed to fixing his personal life and marriage, or just his career and public perception? Like all the other questions, it remains to be seen.
As for my opinion on that matter, as crazy as it sounds, I think his marriage might be what's most important. Call me ignorant if you want. Hear me out first though.
One of the last points Tiger made during his 14 minute speech was that he'd be returning to rehab immediately and putting golf on hold for the time being. He'll be back on the course at some point, but when and where have yet to be determined. It may have seemed like a point in passing to you, but to me, that was the most important signal of what Tiger's real intentions are.
Here's why: If I was Tiger's career advisor, I'd tell him that he needs to back onto the course. Maybe not next week, or the week after, and he certainly doesn't need to play a whole tour schedule. But if I were advising him, I'd make it a point to play a tournament here or there, in the midst of his ongoing therapy.
Why? The answer is easy really.
The longer Tiger Woods stays away from the golf course, the longer he's simply "Tiger Woods adulterer," as opposed to "Tiger Woods adultering golfer," and later on down the road, just "Tiger Woods the golfer."
But by playing in tournaments, by being in the public eye, kissing babies, signing autographs, NOT hitting on iHop waitresses, all that adultery stuff would start to fade away. Not today or tomorrow, but sooner. I mean seriously, look how this one press conference has already begun to sway public opinion. Right afterward I heard one analyst, call Tiger "courageous." Really, courageous? Our brothers, sisters, friends and family fighting a war in Iraq are courageous. Tiger Woods is simply a very public figure that got caught with his pants around his ankles. Again though, it doesn't matter, because by making this one appearance, he's already started to win people back.
But instead of doing just that, getting into the public spotlight and playing golf, Tiger is going to rehab and will be out of the spotlight for awhile. How long, only he, his doctors and his wife Elin know for sure.
Here's the thing though, by staying out of the spotlight, he's allowing the public image to sway back the other way. Just because Tiger goes into hiding, doesn't mean the stories are going to stop. It doesn't mean that US Weekly or the National Enquirer will stop digging, stop printing stories and stop searching through strip clubs looking for Tiger's paw prints.
Which again, is why if I were advising his career, I'd tell him to get back on the course. Once a month, once every six weeks, whatever. Just so the focus is back on golf, rather than finding more dirt on the guy.
But Tiger's not doing that, which to my original point might mean that his marriage might be what really matters. By sacrificing golf, sacrificing photo opportunities and Oprah's couch, he's also sacrificing a chance to rehabilitate his public image. And he's sacrificing it to work on his personal one.
At least in theory, Tiger is telling us that all the money, and fame and adoration don't matter. That his wife, and kids come before his career and wealth. Which seems the logical move of a man a true family man. Again though, maybe it's just a savvy move by a good PR team. Only Tiger knows what his true motives are.
After re-watching Tiger's speech on Monday morning, I believe that his most important message came early in the speech, when he said right before the two minute mark:
"As Elin pointed out to me, my real apology to her will not come in the form of words, it will come in my behavior over time."
Good point.
So, is Tiger Woods really sorry about what he did? Is he really a changed man? I can't say one way or the other, and neither can you. It seems to me like right now, even Tiger isn't sure.
But after all the time away, all the waiting, we finally got a public appearance we wanted on Friday. He looked older, worn down and nervous, and you could see that the last few months have taken their toll on him.
At the same time, after all his time away, and all the rumors, innuendo and questions, did we actually learn anything?
From what I could tell, not much, if anything, at all.
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